Parents! Is college the right path for your child or is there another option?

         Here you are. Your teen is entering high school. You have big dreams for your child. You see their potential. You have invested in them so far and made them a priority. Your child's journey looks different from those around you, but you have adhered to the qualities that make up an effective parent as outlined by the U.S. Department of Education. You demonstrate love, offer support, define limits, set an example, teach them how to work hard and keep their commitments, provide meaningful activities, and show them the respect they have earned (Being, 2005). It will not be long and you will watch your child choose a path that will hopefully lead them to a meaningful and productive future. What will that path look like for your child? What if they have no desire to go to college? Do you know of other options? How can you help them find the path that is best for them?  

        You are your child’s advocate when it comes to a bright future. You value your child’s thoughts when it comes to what interests they have. You value their independence and want to be part of the solution as they explore pathways that best fit their unique style and personality. You do not want them to be burdened with unnecessary debt just because society says that they must go to college to be successful. You have a vested interest in helping your children become responsible, contributing members of society. One article by Becky Mather (2020) titled, “Preparation for Life After High School: The Future Lies Beyond Your Basement” by Becky Mather suggests that parents help their children visualize what life beyond high school looks like. She recommends bringing up the future often even if the conversation is short as long as it stays positive. She also counsels parents to initiate family outings that explore technical schools, potential job opportunities, and career tracks that do not require a college degree. Her final words of wisdom are to help your child see the next stage of life as an adventure and not something to fear. 

        It is our duty as parents to help our children figure out a path that explores options for a future where they can experience happiness and success. As we do this, we have a need to “understand [our children] deeply as individuals, the way we would want to be understood” (Covey, 2020, p. 222). To understand in this way, open communication is needed. One of the most important aspects of communication is the ability to really listen. When it comes to listening to your teens, experts suggest three things:

    1. Let your teen complete their thoughts without interruption.

    2. Do not jump in with your ideas about how to fix things. 

    3. You don’t have to agree or disagree with everything your teen says.

                                                                                                    (Communcating, n.d.) 

If you are anything like me, your ability to listen is a work in progress. You also find this part of the journey daunting and overwhelming. You need answers and ideas about what choices are out there. Did you know that 14% of employees at Google do not have a college degree? Did you know that 10% of the employment opportunities in the United States do not require a college degree and a person can still earn $53,000 a year? Some of those opportunities include becoming a pharmacy technician, dental assistant, esthetician, manicurist, medical assistant, police officer, and court reporter (Smith, n.d.). Does your child have any interest in these? Can you use them as a launchpad as you brainstorm other ideas together?                         

10 Careers That Do Not Require a 4 Year Degree from careerglider

        I have three grown-up sons. Their junior year was such a pivotal time. I saw them less and less. With my oldest, I began a tradition of taking them away from their life and natural habitat for a few days. During those days, I had prepared a list of questions to ask them that would get them thinking about their future. It is an experience I will always cherish as they openly shared their thoughts and feelings. Not every parent has the resources to have the experience I was privileged to have. My call to action this week is for you to orchestrate one conversation about what kind of future your child envisions for themselves. As they talk, “keep your eyes, ears, and mind open” (Lichty, Rosenberg, & Laughlin, 2018, p. 637). Some questions that can get you started:

I would love to hear what you discovered in your conversation. Leave a comment below and spread the message to other parents by sharing my blog. Together with teachers, we can help our children find the right path. #collegeisnotthepathforeveryone 

References

Communicating with your adolescent. (n.d.). National Center on the Sexual Behavior of Youth. https://ncsby.org/content/communicating-your-adolescent

Covey, S. R. (2020). The 7 habits of highly effective people, Chapter about HABIT 3. 

Four questions to ask your teen about their future. My Ideal College. (2021, February 16).  https://www.myidealcollege.org/questions-teen-about-future/

Lichty, L. F., Rosenberg, K., Laughlin, K. (2018). Before there Is a table: Small wins to build a movement against sexual and relationship violence in a university context. Journal of Family Violence, 33, 629-645. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10896-018-9986-z

Mather, B. (2020, November 5). Preparation for life after high school: The future 

lies beyond your basement. Parenthetical. https://parenthetical.wisc.edu/2016/05/09/preparation-for-life-after-high-school-the-future-lies-beyond-your-basement/

Smith, P. (n.d.). Careers You Can Have with No Bachelors or 4 Year Degree. Career Glider. https://www.careerglider.com/blog/top-careers-can-have-no-bachelors-degree/

US Department of Education (ED). (2005, December 15). Being an effective parent -- helping your child through early adolescence. Home. https://www2.ed.gov/parents/academic/help/adolescence/part5.html

Image Sources

Despain, N. (2022). Original text. Adventure. https://www.lifeadventures.us/wp-

content/uploads/2014/05/109-800x400.jpg

Ten careers that don’t require a 4-year degree graphic. (n.d.). Career Glider.  https://www.slideshare.net/careerglider/careerglider-successful-mpv1